Talking Without Saying a Word
Verbal communication is the primary attribute that separates man from beast. However as human kind has learned more about psychology and physiology, we have begun to discover how non-verbal communication can impact our interactions with the people around us. This concept has always fascinated me for a variety of reasons. Throughout high school, my passion for psychology and behavior has grown resulting in what could almost be considered obsession. How our mind works and unlocking the secrets behind why we do the things we do is something that keeps me up thinking at night. I believe this fascination stemmed from the bed time talks I would have with my mother in elementary school. I distinctly remember multiple nights when I would burst into tears telling my mom about how a couple kids at school would call me names. I remember her telling me that they might be trying to make me feel bad because it made them feel better about their own insecurities. From then on, I would always try to analyze how people acted to try and understand why they acted that way.
As I got older, one of my favorite shows on television was Brain Games on National Geographic channel. It was a fascinating show that tackled many psychological issues; I ate it up. I specifically recall watching one episode of Brain Games entitled “Language.” The episode talked about how people communicate verbally and non-verbally. While the segments about spoken language were interesting, the part of the show that really spoke to me was one about body language. In the segment, the viewer was supposed to guess who the boss was out of a group of employees in a meeting; the catch was that there was no audio. When I watched the episode for the first time, I had no idea how to figure out who the boss was. When the boss was revealed and the telling body language cues were highlighted, I had one of those, “wow” moments. It was incredible to think about how much people reveal about who they are without saying one word. I have developed such an appreciation for body language that I even look forward to watching poker on TV just so I can analyze how professionals read each other to find subtle cues.
Choosing the topic for my senior project was difficult. I knew I wanted to do something rooted in psychology but I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of interesting topics in the field. It took a lot of thought and collaboration with others to finally narrow down my question. Finally, I recalled what I learned from my mother about trying to understand others and I remembered how enthralled I was by the body language segments on Brain Games. This process led me to ask the question: How do one’s non-verbal cues affect communication and change people’s perception of them?
What makes the topic of non-verbal communication such an exciting yet daunting field to research is the sheer scope of it. To put it in to perspective, the secrets behind non-verbal communication are not only studied by kinesics who specialize in non-verbal communication, but also by linguists, semiotics, and anthropologists (Stollznow). Non-verbal communication can also go hand in hand with the study of more traditional human behavior and even evolutionary study. For example, according to Frans de Waal, a professor at Emory University in Georgia, the chimpanzee and ape are two creatures that have been shown to have complex communication without the use of actual language (Buchanan). Waal is making the point that even though they cannot talk, man’s evolutionary cousins are still able to express themselves simply through the power of non-verbal communication. While there is still more and more being learned about non-verbal communication every day, the research and information about the topic that is already out there is very impressive to say the least.
To fully understand all the intricacies of non-verbal communication, it is important to understand the basic concepts first. The most important concepts to understand are the differences between non-verbal communication and body language. Kris Rugsaken from the University of Ballpoint defines body language as, “all the communication through the non-verbal channel” (Rugsaken). Both body language and non-verbal communication refer to the ways people communicate and express themselves without using words. They both include habits like body movements while speaking, eye movements, and the proximity to which one stands while talking with another person. Where the two concepts differ is the scope of their meanings. While body language focuses more on physical movements, non-verbal communication encapsulates other factors such as tone of voice, clothing, and even how one wears their hair (Rugsaken). It is also important to note that depending on the source, the two terms are sometimes used interchangeably.
The second important concept to understand about non-verbal communication is how significant its impact is in every kind of interaction. In fact, esteemed anthropologist Edward T. Hall has concluded over the years that more than 60% of our understanding of social interaction comes from picking up non-verbal cues (Rugsaken). One poignant example of the impact of non-verbal communication comes from a woman named Caloren Johnstone, who told her story of being diagnosed with breast cancer. When she first heard the diagnosis that she had breast cancer, Johnstone’s understandable feelings of shock and horror were multiplied by the body language of the physician delivering the news. In her own words:
First, the physician did not look at me. In fact, he turned away and spoke to the ground. Because of this, I had a hard time hearing what he was saying. Second, his speaking to the ground told me that whatever he was saying was so horrific that he couldn't look me in the eye, and I stopped listening. I felt deep within that his actions reflected what he thought my outcome would be horrific. (Johnstone)
Though she was depressed and lacked the will to fight, Johnstone begrudgingly went in to talk to her oncologist to talk about the cancer. The oncologist greeted Johnstone with a smile and held her hand when she explained her treatment options. The optimistic body language made the situation more palatable for Johnstone resulting in her being more open to her treatment. Her oncologist’s body language was one of the reasons Johnstone decided to fight a battle against cancer that she ultimately won. Positive non-verbal communication saved her life (Johnstone).
With the definition and importance of non-verbal communication expressed, to fully understand non-verbal’s impact on overall communication it is necessary to look at it in a variety of different scenarios. One place non-verbal where communication plays a substantial role is the classroom. A healthy understanding of non-verbal communication can make the difference between a good teacher and a bad teacher. Whether it is reading the overall tone of the class, or setting a mood, a teacher can accomplish a variety of different goals through their understanding and use of body language and non-verbal communication. Two of the most basic types of non-verbal cues teacher must know how to recognize and interpret in the classroom are silence and oculesics, or eye movements. More specifically, PhD Brock Barry wrote that if a teacher asks a student a question and is greeted with silence, this can mean one of three things: the student does not know the answer, the student does not understand the question, or the student is being rebellious (Barry). Oclesics is very telling of a student’s disposition as well. Assala Mihoubi from the University of Adrar noted that the most basic example is that held eye contact relates that a student is interested while little to no eye contact can be a sign of disinterest or shyness. Though it can be hard to tell if the teacher is far away from a student, a teacher can also determine if a student is interested in a topic if their pupils are dilated, though it can also be a sign of attraction as dilated pupils are a positive physiological response to a stimulus (Mihoubi).
One primary source of information regarding non-verbal communication in school comes from an interview with Creston Higgins, a 7th grade teacher from Walnut Creek, California. She uses a wide variety of different non-verbal cues on a daily basis to deliver subtle yet effective messages to her classic. To keep students engaged and on tasks, Higgins explained that she often will stand in silence, with a stern face and her eyebrows raised to communicate that is it time to focus if students are being overly rambunctious. Though no words are spoken, the message she delivers is crystal clear. Along with the specific non-verbal cues she employs, she also took a step back to deliver her thoughts on non-verbal communication as a whole. When asked about the importance of student and teacher understanding of non-verbal communication, Mrs. Higgins replied: “It’s really important for teachers to be present for their students, and nonverbal communication can say a lot, positive and negative.”
Another obvious situation where a healthy understanding of non-verbal communication is imperative is public speaking. While it can be sometimes overlooked, confident body language in public speaking can be a source of subtle ethos and the difference between a mediocre and breathtaking speech. The most predominant form of nonverbal communication in public speaking is body language. Because the bulk of the information in a speech is presented verbally, body language is mostly used to accentuate points and convey confidence. The trick with body language in public speaking is to not overdo it or under do it. To provide an example, the University of Pittsburgh public speaking department highlighted how facial expressions are a fantastic way to add emotion and passion to a speech. This impact can be lost though if the speaker does not convey the expression obviously enough. On the flip side, the message can be overlooked if the audience is too busy marveling at the speaker’s grossly contorted face instead of listening to the words the speaker is speaking (Nonverbal). Another important part of body language in public speaking goes back to the aforementioned concept of oclesics. Good eye contact is crucial for public speaking. When public speaking, it is important to avoid staring at notecards and as the University of Pittsburgh public speaking website explains, “distribute your gaze evenly around the room” (Nonverbal). It is also a common misconception that while public speaking, one should look directly above a person in the audience if they are nervous. This is easily detected by the audience and can be awkward. Public speaking is all about seeming confident and keeping the audience engaged, both of which can be accomplished through proper body language.
One of the overlooked places where good body language is crucial is the professional world. During a job interview, positive non-verbal cues are a way that one can set themselves above the competition. To start and end an interview, Jamie Dolce from the University of Connecticut explains that a firm handshake is a great way to appear confident and prepared. On the other side of the coin, a limp handed handshake can be a sign of nervousness (Dolce). During the interview, the same rules about eye contact still apply as well. On top of that, Dolce says it is important that one considers their hand position. Keeping one’s arms and hands uncrossed is a great way to subliminally tell the interviewer they are open, social and confident. Crossed arms can make the interviewee come across as unenthused or apathetic (Dolce).
Within the workplace, the role of non-verbal communication can change depending on where one is in a company. For the average Joe employee at a company looking to work their way up in a company, one great way to get ahead is to dress well. The phrase “dress to impress” has been around for a while now, but its message is grounded in fact. According to an article by Ray Smith from the Wall Street journal, countless studies including one conducted at the Yale school of management have determined that more professional clothes go hand in hand with higher productivity and advancement in a company (Smith). Furthermore, the article went on to say that when the dress policy at the workplace is something like business casual, it is the best time to dress up more. Dressing up a little more when it is not required relates that the person is driven and looking to get ahead (Smith). Understanding this concept is a great way to get the upper hand on the competition for promotions.
As a manager, non-verbal communication is also a really good way to add to morale in the workplace and increase employee motivation. The University of Maryland released an article about body language in which they highlighted some interesting facts about the relationship between manager non-verbal communication and workplace attitude and productivity. The article explained that when there is positive body language coming from the manager, the other employees will feet off this positive vibe. This is what is known as the “cascade effect” (Five). It is important to be aware of the effects from positive non-verbal communication from mangers. The article also explains that less than one third of workers are engaged at work (Five). Obviously with worker engagement so low, if managers are aware of the significant impact they can have on their workers through their non-verbals they can greatly improve their company. If the manager’s set the example, the workers will follow suit and it all stems from simple non-verbal communication.
When one imagines a therapist’s office, they imagine a welcoming environment that is easy to take comfort in; they imagine a safe space. Student and marriage counselor Mary Phalon’s office is no exception. The warm color tones of her walls and room convey a positive, even soothing message. In the back corner, bright colored toys bring awareness to the fact that she helps people of all ages. Her color coordinated dark couch and loveseats sit facing each other. While it forces eye contact, it does so with the upmost comfort. It is easy to relax in the room and feel right at home. When someone comes to visit Mrs. Phalon, her room is the first way she communicates non-verbally.
As a counselor and therapist, Mary Phalon has a lot of experience with different types of non-verbal communication. As someone who works with kids at a middle school, the type of non-verbal communication she sees on a daily basis can be varied. One thing she sees often if combative body language. Many times during the day, she’ll notice kids turn away from her to show they are not listening or they will roll their eyes to communicate their disgust. When she meets with parents, she can gather a lot of information about the parents and their children by the body language. For example, if she gives the child a paper to review and the parent immediately snatches it away, Phalon can determine that the parent has some trust issues with their son or daughter. She has also become privy to different non-verbal communication habits of people from different cultures. In fact, she said that recently she had to manage a conflict where a girl was upset with a boy for kissing her. When she explored the issue further, she learned that kissing is a standard greeting for people in the boy’s culture. When asked about the importance of understanding non-verbal communication and the reasons why non-verbal communication is different from person to person, Phalon responded, “Well, I..I think it is the definition of empathy.” She explained that one’s non-verbal communication habits are the sum of their experiences and that a wide spread understanding of this concept is a step in the direction of a more accepting world.
Non-verbal communication is integral to everyday life. People do not full realize how much of their interactions with others are judged on their body language and other non-verbal cues. Understanding all of the factors that contribute to good body language is the best way to get ahead in almost every aspect of life. Whether it is trying to look good in an interview or trying to be a more empathetic person, a healthy understanding of non-verbal communication is a sure fire ticket to self-improvement.
Verbal communication is the primary attribute that separates man from beast. However as human kind has learned more about psychology and physiology, we have begun to discover how non-verbal communication can impact our interactions with the people around us. This concept has always fascinated me for a variety of reasons. Throughout high school, my passion for psychology and behavior has grown resulting in what could almost be considered obsession. How our mind works and unlocking the secrets behind why we do the things we do is something that keeps me up thinking at night. I believe this fascination stemmed from the bed time talks I would have with my mother in elementary school. I distinctly remember multiple nights when I would burst into tears telling my mom about how a couple kids at school would call me names. I remember her telling me that they might be trying to make me feel bad because it made them feel better about their own insecurities. From then on, I would always try to analyze how people acted to try and understand why they acted that way.
As I got older, one of my favorite shows on television was Brain Games on National Geographic channel. It was a fascinating show that tackled many psychological issues; I ate it up. I specifically recall watching one episode of Brain Games entitled “Language.” The episode talked about how people communicate verbally and non-verbally. While the segments about spoken language were interesting, the part of the show that really spoke to me was one about body language. In the segment, the viewer was supposed to guess who the boss was out of a group of employees in a meeting; the catch was that there was no audio. When I watched the episode for the first time, I had no idea how to figure out who the boss was. When the boss was revealed and the telling body language cues were highlighted, I had one of those, “wow” moments. It was incredible to think about how much people reveal about who they are without saying one word. I have developed such an appreciation for body language that I even look forward to watching poker on TV just so I can analyze how professionals read each other to find subtle cues.
Choosing the topic for my senior project was difficult. I knew I wanted to do something rooted in psychology but I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of interesting topics in the field. It took a lot of thought and collaboration with others to finally narrow down my question. Finally, I recalled what I learned from my mother about trying to understand others and I remembered how enthralled I was by the body language segments on Brain Games. This process led me to ask the question: How do one’s non-verbal cues affect communication and change people’s perception of them?
What makes the topic of non-verbal communication such an exciting yet daunting field to research is the sheer scope of it. To put it in to perspective, the secrets behind non-verbal communication are not only studied by kinesics who specialize in non-verbal communication, but also by linguists, semiotics, and anthropologists (Stollznow). Non-verbal communication can also go hand in hand with the study of more traditional human behavior and even evolutionary study. For example, according to Frans de Waal, a professor at Emory University in Georgia, the chimpanzee and ape are two creatures that have been shown to have complex communication without the use of actual language (Buchanan). Waal is making the point that even though they cannot talk, man’s evolutionary cousins are still able to express themselves simply through the power of non-verbal communication. While there is still more and more being learned about non-verbal communication every day, the research and information about the topic that is already out there is very impressive to say the least.
To fully understand all the intricacies of non-verbal communication, it is important to understand the basic concepts first. The most important concepts to understand are the differences between non-verbal communication and body language. Kris Rugsaken from the University of Ballpoint defines body language as, “all the communication through the non-verbal channel” (Rugsaken). Both body language and non-verbal communication refer to the ways people communicate and express themselves without using words. They both include habits like body movements while speaking, eye movements, and the proximity to which one stands while talking with another person. Where the two concepts differ is the scope of their meanings. While body language focuses more on physical movements, non-verbal communication encapsulates other factors such as tone of voice, clothing, and even how one wears their hair (Rugsaken). It is also important to note that depending on the source, the two terms are sometimes used interchangeably.
The second important concept to understand about non-verbal communication is how significant its impact is in every kind of interaction. In fact, esteemed anthropologist Edward T. Hall has concluded over the years that more than 60% of our understanding of social interaction comes from picking up non-verbal cues (Rugsaken). One poignant example of the impact of non-verbal communication comes from a woman named Caloren Johnstone, who told her story of being diagnosed with breast cancer. When she first heard the diagnosis that she had breast cancer, Johnstone’s understandable feelings of shock and horror were multiplied by the body language of the physician delivering the news. In her own words:
First, the physician did not look at me. In fact, he turned away and spoke to the ground. Because of this, I had a hard time hearing what he was saying. Second, his speaking to the ground told me that whatever he was saying was so horrific that he couldn't look me in the eye, and I stopped listening. I felt deep within that his actions reflected what he thought my outcome would be horrific. (Johnstone)
Though she was depressed and lacked the will to fight, Johnstone begrudgingly went in to talk to her oncologist to talk about the cancer. The oncologist greeted Johnstone with a smile and held her hand when she explained her treatment options. The optimistic body language made the situation more palatable for Johnstone resulting in her being more open to her treatment. Her oncologist’s body language was one of the reasons Johnstone decided to fight a battle against cancer that she ultimately won. Positive non-verbal communication saved her life (Johnstone).
With the definition and importance of non-verbal communication expressed, to fully understand non-verbal’s impact on overall communication it is necessary to look at it in a variety of different scenarios. One place non-verbal where communication plays a substantial role is the classroom. A healthy understanding of non-verbal communication can make the difference between a good teacher and a bad teacher. Whether it is reading the overall tone of the class, or setting a mood, a teacher can accomplish a variety of different goals through their understanding and use of body language and non-verbal communication. Two of the most basic types of non-verbal cues teacher must know how to recognize and interpret in the classroom are silence and oculesics, or eye movements. More specifically, PhD Brock Barry wrote that if a teacher asks a student a question and is greeted with silence, this can mean one of three things: the student does not know the answer, the student does not understand the question, or the student is being rebellious (Barry). Oclesics is very telling of a student’s disposition as well. Assala Mihoubi from the University of Adrar noted that the most basic example is that held eye contact relates that a student is interested while little to no eye contact can be a sign of disinterest or shyness. Though it can be hard to tell if the teacher is far away from a student, a teacher can also determine if a student is interested in a topic if their pupils are dilated, though it can also be a sign of attraction as dilated pupils are a positive physiological response to a stimulus (Mihoubi).
One primary source of information regarding non-verbal communication in school comes from an interview with Creston Higgins, a 7th grade teacher from Walnut Creek, California. She uses a wide variety of different non-verbal cues on a daily basis to deliver subtle yet effective messages to her classic. To keep students engaged and on tasks, Higgins explained that she often will stand in silence, with a stern face and her eyebrows raised to communicate that is it time to focus if students are being overly rambunctious. Though no words are spoken, the message she delivers is crystal clear. Along with the specific non-verbal cues she employs, she also took a step back to deliver her thoughts on non-verbal communication as a whole. When asked about the importance of student and teacher understanding of non-verbal communication, Mrs. Higgins replied: “It’s really important for teachers to be present for their students, and nonverbal communication can say a lot, positive and negative.”
Another obvious situation where a healthy understanding of non-verbal communication is imperative is public speaking. While it can be sometimes overlooked, confident body language in public speaking can be a source of subtle ethos and the difference between a mediocre and breathtaking speech. The most predominant form of nonverbal communication in public speaking is body language. Because the bulk of the information in a speech is presented verbally, body language is mostly used to accentuate points and convey confidence. The trick with body language in public speaking is to not overdo it or under do it. To provide an example, the University of Pittsburgh public speaking department highlighted how facial expressions are a fantastic way to add emotion and passion to a speech. This impact can be lost though if the speaker does not convey the expression obviously enough. On the flip side, the message can be overlooked if the audience is too busy marveling at the speaker’s grossly contorted face instead of listening to the words the speaker is speaking (Nonverbal). Another important part of body language in public speaking goes back to the aforementioned concept of oclesics. Good eye contact is crucial for public speaking. When public speaking, it is important to avoid staring at notecards and as the University of Pittsburgh public speaking website explains, “distribute your gaze evenly around the room” (Nonverbal). It is also a common misconception that while public speaking, one should look directly above a person in the audience if they are nervous. This is easily detected by the audience and can be awkward. Public speaking is all about seeming confident and keeping the audience engaged, both of which can be accomplished through proper body language.
One of the overlooked places where good body language is crucial is the professional world. During a job interview, positive non-verbal cues are a way that one can set themselves above the competition. To start and end an interview, Jamie Dolce from the University of Connecticut explains that a firm handshake is a great way to appear confident and prepared. On the other side of the coin, a limp handed handshake can be a sign of nervousness (Dolce). During the interview, the same rules about eye contact still apply as well. On top of that, Dolce says it is important that one considers their hand position. Keeping one’s arms and hands uncrossed is a great way to subliminally tell the interviewer they are open, social and confident. Crossed arms can make the interviewee come across as unenthused or apathetic (Dolce).
Within the workplace, the role of non-verbal communication can change depending on where one is in a company. For the average Joe employee at a company looking to work their way up in a company, one great way to get ahead is to dress well. The phrase “dress to impress” has been around for a while now, but its message is grounded in fact. According to an article by Ray Smith from the Wall Street journal, countless studies including one conducted at the Yale school of management have determined that more professional clothes go hand in hand with higher productivity and advancement in a company (Smith). Furthermore, the article went on to say that when the dress policy at the workplace is something like business casual, it is the best time to dress up more. Dressing up a little more when it is not required relates that the person is driven and looking to get ahead (Smith). Understanding this concept is a great way to get the upper hand on the competition for promotions.
As a manager, non-verbal communication is also a really good way to add to morale in the workplace and increase employee motivation. The University of Maryland released an article about body language in which they highlighted some interesting facts about the relationship between manager non-verbal communication and workplace attitude and productivity. The article explained that when there is positive body language coming from the manager, the other employees will feet off this positive vibe. This is what is known as the “cascade effect” (Five). It is important to be aware of the effects from positive non-verbal communication from mangers. The article also explains that less than one third of workers are engaged at work (Five). Obviously with worker engagement so low, if managers are aware of the significant impact they can have on their workers through their non-verbals they can greatly improve their company. If the manager’s set the example, the workers will follow suit and it all stems from simple non-verbal communication.
When one imagines a therapist’s office, they imagine a welcoming environment that is easy to take comfort in; they imagine a safe space. Student and marriage counselor Mary Phalon’s office is no exception. The warm color tones of her walls and room convey a positive, even soothing message. In the back corner, bright colored toys bring awareness to the fact that she helps people of all ages. Her color coordinated dark couch and loveseats sit facing each other. While it forces eye contact, it does so with the upmost comfort. It is easy to relax in the room and feel right at home. When someone comes to visit Mrs. Phalon, her room is the first way she communicates non-verbally.
As a counselor and therapist, Mary Phalon has a lot of experience with different types of non-verbal communication. As someone who works with kids at a middle school, the type of non-verbal communication she sees on a daily basis can be varied. One thing she sees often if combative body language. Many times during the day, she’ll notice kids turn away from her to show they are not listening or they will roll their eyes to communicate their disgust. When she meets with parents, she can gather a lot of information about the parents and their children by the body language. For example, if she gives the child a paper to review and the parent immediately snatches it away, Phalon can determine that the parent has some trust issues with their son or daughter. She has also become privy to different non-verbal communication habits of people from different cultures. In fact, she said that recently she had to manage a conflict where a girl was upset with a boy for kissing her. When she explored the issue further, she learned that kissing is a standard greeting for people in the boy’s culture. When asked about the importance of understanding non-verbal communication and the reasons why non-verbal communication is different from person to person, Phalon responded, “Well, I..I think it is the definition of empathy.” She explained that one’s non-verbal communication habits are the sum of their experiences and that a wide spread understanding of this concept is a step in the direction of a more accepting world.
Non-verbal communication is integral to everyday life. People do not full realize how much of their interactions with others are judged on their body language and other non-verbal cues. Understanding all of the factors that contribute to good body language is the best way to get ahead in almost every aspect of life. Whether it is trying to look good in an interview or trying to be a more empathetic person, a healthy understanding of non-verbal communication is a sure fire ticket to self-improvement.